We regularly make the trip to a nearby city for their massive Asian market and stock up on weird (to us) candy, unusual veggies, mysterious sauces, Kewpie Mayo, etc. We make a point of getting something totally unknown to us each time, just for kicks. This time, Sophie picked out these:
Durian Flavored Cream Wafers. Seems innocuous enough. It’s just little square cookies, right?
When we opened the package, we were assaulted with the most disgusting smell I have ever smelled, something between fetid old gym socks and pus. I’m not kidding. Apparently this is just how the durian fruit smells. I don’t know, I haven’t had one, although I hear they are quite the delicacy in some circles, an acquired taste that some people actually…like. They make durian ice cream, for example. Which is shocking because listen, I am serious as a heart attack about the smell. Really, really bad.
Sophie actually tried one, a small nibble. She is so brave.
She had to spit it out. Then the cookies themselves, once the package was open, stank up the yurt. I put them in a plastic bag and knotted it, but when we came back from a walk all we could say upon opening the door, was “Holy Mother of Chocolate, what the heck is that SMELL?” Answer: still the durian wafers. I put them outside, still in the bag. But we could smell them when we opened the door. I actually don’t know where they are now. Sophie and Luc took on the quest of disposing of them. I fear for the local wildlife.
Somewhere, in a board room maybe, someone at “Garden Co.” decided flavoring a low-end, rock-gut, cream wafer with durian was a good idea. They thought, “Yes, we will sell these internationally. We will make a profit. This will work.” Heck, maybe it IS working: a couple of people defend them in the customer reviews on amazon, so maybe these have a secret, cult following. And, hey, I mean, we bought them. They got our $1.09. (Actually, how much of that buck is actually going to Garden, I wonder? It can’t be much, given shipping costs, and middle-men costs.)
Bottom line: the mystery of the durian wafer is unfathomable. Plus: people will eat anything. I hope this doesn’t put Sophie off trying weird shit. I think that’s a cool characteristic of hers. I’ve gotten so staid in my old age. It’s embarrassing, really.