to do lists
I was waiting for Luc to put on his shoes this morning, something he really wanted to do himself, which is fine, but it can take a while and we were running late. I was counting my deep breaths and fighting the urge to just do it for him, which he would hate, when finally, in a funny-friendly-exasperated voice, I said, “Dude, come on, I’ve got things to do!”
He looked up calmly and said, “I have more things to do than you do, Mom.”
Surprised, and, I have to admit, a bit skeptical, I said, “You do?”
“Yes.”
I started counting off on my fingers. “I’ve got laundry, dishes, clean up the yurt, get ready for your birthday party, write a novel, do yoga, and be sweet to you every chance I get. What have you got?”
He counted on his fingers, too. “I’ve got to blow bubbles, find my pirate hat, wait for my movie to come from netflix, draw a picture of a liopleurodon because I haven’t done that one yet, play outside, poop, and do my dragon puzzle. And find some leaves for my sculpture. That’s more than you.”
It’s just the old standard way of thinking, isn’t it, that would value my list as more important than his. But it’s not. Not to him. And why would what is important to one human (me) be more valid than what is important to another human (him)? We’re at different parts of life, sure, but one age is not more important than another age. He knows that. I guess I needed the reminder.
“Wow,” I said. “I stand corrected. You’re a busy guy.”
“Yes. I am.” He finished his shoes. Cue the celebration! “Okay, I’m ready.”
Have I mention how much I love him?
(And for anyone who might not know, a liopleurodon is an ocean dwelling pliosaur, as long as a blue whale, with wicked, spooky teeth. I looked it up.)
Category: kiddo life
What a great post. There’s a real irony in the idea that we need to impose “structure” and “discipline” to MAKE kids do WORK, since in my observation their days are filled with all sorts of real work. Of course, as you point out, the problem is that as adults we value our work above theirs. When I see the joy and intensity that my kids bring to their work, it seems to me that I’m the one who should be learning about work from them!
Love it, love it, love it! Kids have such a great way of reminding us of values, consideration for others, what’s important in life … they’re such intelligent, untainted little people. Thanks for sharing.
Beautiful, you make me cry. I love you. Mom
Maya,
I love this post. Hope it makes my re-think shoe time with Harper tomorrow. Ava and Harper would love a play date sometime. Let’s try to work something out.
Wendy
Hey, that would be great, Wendy!